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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27547213">hold me closer tiny dancer</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRPL/pseuds/TheRPL'>TheRPL</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Cuddling &amp; Snuggling, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy, Kinda, Kissing, M/M, Mentioned WayV Ensemble, Minor Injuries, One Shot, Sharing a Bed, Sort Of, a little bit, kiss and make up, no beta we die like men</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 17:41:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,165</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27547213</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRPL/pseuds/TheRPL</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten is their star. </p>
<p>Kun is aware of that. Painfully so. </p>
<p>And because he is Ten, he outshines everyone.</p>
<p>If only Ten could show up late, or half-ass rehearsals, or act like a diva. But of course, he doesn’t. Not Ten. </p>
<p>He is grateful, and trains hard, and does his best always.</p>
<p>Ten is the star. He has a talent for being loved. He also has a talent for getting under Kun’s skin.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Qian Kun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>431</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>hold me closer tiny dancer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i was bored so i wrote more kuntent ~~ enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ten is their star. </p>
<p>Kun is aware of that. Painfully so. </p>
<p>WayV is the Chinese unit of NCT, and Ten is the star. He was chosen to be front and center, and he delivers, singing all his lines beautifully, dancing gracefully, captivating every single one of their fans. </p>
<p>He is the familiar name, the familiar face, the person everyone knows and loves. </p>
<p>And because he is Ten, he outshines everyone.</p>
<p>Not that’s what Ten wants. Not that he demands lines, or attention, or special treatment. He doesn’t do any of that. It is unnerving to Kun that he doesn’t. If only Ten could show up late, or half-ass rehearsals, or act like a diva. </p>
<p>But of course he doesn’t. Not Ten. </p>
<p>He is grateful, and trains hard, and does his best always, and Kun finds him practicing posing for photos at home while brushing his teeth because that’s just how little time they have for anything that isn’t dance practice.</p>
<p>And Ten is beautiful. So beautiful Kun often cannot comprehend it sometimes. Why does he have to be so goddamn beautiful?</p>
<p>Kun used to think he was a good singer. And a decent dancer. He likes music and can produce his own. Next to anyone else, he is an ace. One of a kind. But he knows the cliche. The small town prodigy moves to the big city, and realizes he is not as unique as he thinks he is.  </p>
<p>Kun used to think he had talent. He used to think he could accomplish anything. He still thinks so, when he’s not in the same room as Ten. But when he is, everything narrows down to the younger man. To the way he moves. To his smile. Everything narrows down to him in a way that makes little else matter. </p>
<p>Ten is the star. He has a talent for being loved. He also has a talent for getting under Kun’s skin. </p>
<p>*</p>
<p>Kun had a good day. He spent his rare day off in the studio, working on one of his songs. He is happy with how things are progressing, looking forward to recording the vocals on his track. The vision he has in mind is finally coming to fruition! Which is why when he comes home from the studio and is met with absolute chaos, he can only sigh loudly. </p>
<p>“What is going on?” he asks in vain. He stands in the doorway of their living room, observing four grown men… wrestling?</p>
<p>He is promptly ignored by all of them. Ten has Yangyang in a choke-hold, while Kunhang is running away from a giggling Yukhei. </p>
<p>Kun remains there for a few moments, until he starts being scared for Yangyang’s continuing breathing and the very real possibility that Kunhang fractures his head on the coffee table if he were to slip and fall. </p>
<p>“Guys, please stop!”</p>
<p>Yukhei whips around, grinning. “Hey Kunnie!”</p>
<p>“Hi Yukhei.” </p>
<p>Taking advantage of his distraction, Kunhang runs at full speed towards Yukhei, slamming into him. “What the…!” He almost tackles him to the wall, but Yukhei is thankfully strong enough to keep them both upright. </p>
<p>“Kun-ma! Kun-ma!” he hears Yangyang choke. “Ten is trying to murder me!” pants the maknae. Kun knows he is being dramatic, but cannot deny that he is becoming an alarming shade of red.  </p>
<p>“Ten…” warns Kun. </p>
<p>Ten finally raises his head to pout at Kun. “You’re no fun,” he whines as he releases Yangyang. </p>
<p>“Oh god, oh god,” gasps the younger. “I breathe! I live!” He is about to raise both hands in victory when Kun interrupts. </p>
<p>“Get out. I’m sure you’ve got better things to do.”</p>
<p>“Actually, I don’t-”</p>
<p>“Out.”</p>
<p>“But-”</p>
<p>“Yangyang…”</p>
<p>“OK! OK!”</p>
<p>The maknae trots out of the room, pulling his tongue out at Kun once he’s out of reach. “Yangya-” The younger disappears in the corridor. </p>
<p>“Kun-ah. Kun-ge. Gege.” Kun turns around in time to see Ten stick one lip out in his direction. “Why do you have to ruin all the fun all the time?”</p>
<p>Kunhang and Yukhei have resumed their play-fighting, which consists of what appears to be an elaborate game of rock, paper, scissor. He evaluates their game to be harmless enough and turns back to Ten. </p>
<p>“I don’t ruin all the fun all the time.”</p>
<p>“You do. I was just rough-housing the young one a little, and you had to come in here…”</p>
<p>Kun decides that he does not have patience for Ten’s aegyo, or arguing, or both. He shrugs and turns around to make his way to his room. </p>
<p>“I’m talking!”</p>
<p>“I can hear that,” he quips. Ten huffs behind him.  </p>
<p>“You’re no fun…”</p>
<p>“If you say so. I also am anti murder-in-my-living-room.” Finally arrived at his door, Kun whirls around to face Ten. The other man almost walks into him, but stops himself just a few inches short of Kun.</p>
<p>He pouts. “Our leader… do you have to be so strict all the time?”</p>
<p>“Depends,” Kun deadpans. “With you, yes.”</p>
<p>He turns his back to Ten before he is able to see his reaction and opens the door. </p>
<p>“That’s just… That’s not… I’ll ask Yangyang to tell me if you snore!”</p>
<p>“Sure, go ahead,” he says, closing the door in Ten’s face. </p>
<p>*</p>
<p>So it’s not that they are in bad terms. Not at all. Ten is too nice, and caring, and thoughtful about things that really matter to really anger Kun. But he tries really hard to get under his skin. And Kun likes that there is one thing he has over Ten, the one thing he can yield, use as leverage. </p>
<p>He is their leader. </p>
<p>They’re all back from a long day of shooting, and Kun is exhausted. Still, he drags himself to the kitchen, putting on rice in the cooker, chopping up vegetables, re-heating the previous day’s soup. They’re worn-out, all of them, but all react differently to tiredness. Yukhei is surprisingly quiet, sat at the table, head pillowed on his forearms. Dejun and Kunhang are sat too, turned to each other, speaking in soft voices. Ten is teasing Yangyang to no end, making the younger scream and push. The more Yangyang fights back, the more Ten teases, and they are both annoying the ever living hell out of Kun. Sicheng tip toes around them and settles at the dining table. </p>
<p>From the corner of his eyes, Kun can see Yangyang dislodge himself from Ten’s grip, and bat away his wandering hands. Kun doesn’t know when they got so close, when Ten started sprawling himself across the younger, pestering him, looking for attention. He is always looking for attention, it seems. Never from him. </p>
<p>Ten is still laughing when he follows Yangyang in the kitchen, all but throwing himself at the leader. </p>
<p>“Kun-ma,” he says with a high-pitched voice. </p>
<p>Kun hates that name the others have for him. He’s not their mom. Doesn’t want to be. If he’s the group’s mom, he can’t be its leader, confident and put together and masculine. He can’t be a man. And he wants to be seen as one. He wants one person to see him as a man. </p>
<p>“Kun-maaaaa,” Ten says again, latching himself onto Kun’s arm, while he is in the middle of stirring the soup. </p>
<p>“Ten, I’m kind of in the middle of something right now…”</p>
<p>“You’re a mom, I’ve seen you multi-task before,” mocks Ten. </p>
<p>“I’m not a mom, and I’m trying to feed you all before I end up dead on my feet…”</p>
<p>Ten pokes him while Kun checks up on the rice and he thinks he’s had enough for one day. </p>
<p>“Do you always have to be so annoying?” he scorns at Ten, a lot more harshly then intended. He can’t stop himself. “Why don’t learn to stay out of the way?”</p>
<p>Ten’s smile drops. “I didn’t… I’m… What?”</p>
<p>“Can’t you see I’m busy now?” adds Kun, turning back towards the stove without another look at Ten. He barely finishes the sentence that he is already regretting it. </p>
<p>“I see,” says Ten in a small voice. He sounds raw, defenseless, and Kun is already swirling around to apologize when Ten speaks again. “I’ll learn to – how did you say? – stay out of your way.”</p>
<p>He immediately leaves Kun to go sit down next to Sicheng, and remains seated there in complete silence. Sicheng looks at Ten, and then Kun, and raises an eyebrow in question. </p>
<p>Kun feels like crying. He is so tired, and he made Ten sad, or angry, he doesn’t know yet. He observes the members and half of them look like they’re ready to pass out. </p>
<p>The timer rings, the rice is ready. </p>
<p>Kun brings everything at the table. Ten is not looking at him as he eats. He’s also the first one to get up once he’s finished and go to his room. They wolf down their food and soon, they all follow.</p>
<p>*</p>
<p>It becomes evident very quickly that Ten is avoiding him. Kun hates it, hates hearing his laughter die down when Kun enters the room, hates finding him in deep conversation with Kunhang or teasing Yangyang without acknowledging Kun’s presence. </p>
<p>Ten’s hair has gotten longer. One day, he comes back from the stylists blonde. He looks gorgeous. He always does, but like this, with his hair parted in the middle, and the honey colored strands brushing his forehead, Kun knows he’ll take everyone’s breath away. </p>
<p>He himself is in between colors, a faded sort of blue-green, depending on the lighting, and hates every time he sees a reflection of himself in a window or a glass door. He opts for wearing his black cap most days. </p>
<p>They have a photoshoot, and Kun’s hair is finally died dark blue. He likes feeling handsome again, but he knows he’s got nothing on Ten, who is draped on a table under burning spotlights, stretching and eyeing the camera seductively. Ten runs a hand through his own hair and somehow it’s just the right amount of disheveled to look stunning. </p>
<p>Kun tries not to stare until Kunhang drags him away from the shoot. “I don’t know why you’re not talking, but maybe you should try to fix it?” he whispers to the leader. </p>
<p>Kun feels guilty again. He suppresses the feeling. </p>
<p>“I don’t know why it’s such a big deal. We argue all the time.”</p>
<p>Kunhang hums. “You mean, you bicker all the time.”</p>
<p>“No,” corrects Kun. “We argue all the time. You know we don’t get along the way you two do, or the way he does with Yangyang, or Yukhei, or-”</p>
<p>“Or anyone else,” finished Kunhang for him. </p>
<p>“Yeah. Now that you say it, we don’t really get along that well…” Kun laughs humorlessly. He doesn’t know what it is that hurts so much in this realization. Is it that Kun is unable to fight all that he envies in Ten, or the fact that Ten prefers literally the company of anyone else to his? Is Kun so uninteresting?</p>
<p>“Actually, you guys do get along. It’s just, you know, different.” Kunhang says the sentence carefully, closely monitoring Kun’s reaction. </p>
<p>“Yes, I guess we do get along. But most times he either makes fun of me, or ignores me, and frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that he actually dislikes me…”</p>
<p>“Kun,” interrupts Kunhang. “Ten has been feeling down. I would know, we share a room,” he says. He waits for a second, but when he sees that Kun is still listening, he carries on. “I think he’s hurt-”</p>
<p>“Hurt?”</p>
<p>“- and he’s feeling down, and if he didn’t care about you, or what you think, he wouldn’t be so affected by what you said.”</p>
<p>Kun doesn’t know what to answer to that. On the one hand, the notion that Ten might not care for him rips his soul in half. On the other hand, the very idea that he might have genuinely hurt Ten almost brings him to tears. He doesn’t know what he’d rather feel. </p>
<p>“Talk to him soon?” says Kunhang. With a solid clap in the back he leaves Kun there. Automatically, Kun searches for Ten, still posing, still being photographed. He thinks he sees Ten looking back at him but he blinks and Ten is definitely staring at the lens. </p>
<p>*</p>
<p>Kun is coming back form having dinner with Renjun and Chenle. He missed the two boys, missed going out with them, missed going out with people who generally aren’t his members. It makes him feel like a normal person again, just a little bit more whole. </p>
<p>He is walking on his way back to the dorm when he gets a message from Kunhang. </p>
<p>HDRY<br/>yo<br/>is ten with you?</p>
<p>Kun-ge<br/>Ten?<br/>Why would he be with me?</p>
<p>HDRY<br/>idk<br/>he’s not here so i thought…</p>
<p>Kun-ge<br/>Dance studio maybe?</p>
<p>HDRY<br/>yeah<br/>can you check?<br/>where r u anyway?</p>
<p>Kun-ge <br/>On my way home<br/>But sure, I’ll check</p>
<p>HDRY<br/>thx!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So Kun ends up taking a detour by the SM buildings. He’s not too far, just a few blocks away, and Kunhang is right, he might as well go check up on the missing member. </p>
<p>Not that it is unusual for Ten to stay late and practice. He often does. Not that he needs it, thinks Kun to himself, he’s already outdancing them all. </p>
<p>Kun gets inside the building, and automatically strolls towards the dance studios. He sees lights turned on at one of them and slips in the room. There is no discreet entrance in a dance studio, not with eight foot tall mirrors on most walls. Ten is in the process of stretching when he enters. </p>
<p>He ignores Kun. </p>
<p>“Hey.” </p>
<p>Silence. </p>
<p>“Were you practicing?” </p>
<p>Ten looks up at him from where he is stretching over a leg. “I’m finished.”</p>
<p>Kun sighs. He tries to smile at the other man. “Good then, we can walk back together…”</p>
<p>“What are you doing here?” snaps Ten. He sits up, looking at Kun’s reflection in the mirror. </p>
<p>“Kunhang texted saying you weren’t back yet, so I decided to check up on you.”</p>
<p>“You came all the way from the dorms?”</p>
<p>“I was out actually, I was on my way back, so it wasn’t so much of a detour…”</p>
<p>Ten scoffs. “Of course.” He gets up and starts gathering his belongings. </p>
<p>Kun decides to change topic. “I was out with Chenle and Renjun tonight.”</p>
<p>He thinks he sees Ten shudder. “Yeah? Was it nice?”</p>
<p>“Huh, yeah. We went to a ramen place…”</p>
<p>“Good for you,” clips Ten. He whirls around and makes for the door. Kun puts himself in the way. </p>
<p>“Hey, what’s up? I didn’t… I came here to get you. Let’s go back home, OK?”</p>
<p>“I’m just doing what you told me to,” says Ten. “Keeping out of the way.” He’s not looking at Kun, just staring straight past him. </p>
<p>“I didn’t…” starts Kun. “I didn’t mean it. Come on, Ten! You know that. I was tired, and in a bad mood. I said things and I started to regret them as soon as I said them. You know I didn’t mean any of that.” Kun feels out of his depth. How is he supposed to communicate that he never meant for Ten to stay out of his way? That maybe he wanted the opposite? That maybe he wanted Ten very much in his way?</p>
<p>He thinks he sees Ten’s jaw clench, and he knows he just said the wrong thing. “Actually Kun, I don’t know that you don’t mean that.” The man is still not looking at him. “In fact, you are very much invited to follow your own advice.”</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“Leave me alone.” Ten tries to walk past him, but Kun prevents him to do so. </p>
<p>“Ten, you don’t mean-”</p>
<p>“Stay out of my way,” repeats Ten more forcefully, pushing Kun away. </p>
<p>Just like that he leaves. Kun stays behind for a few minutes, speechless, unsure of how to react. Should he run after Ten? He doesn’t think so. There was no mistaking the actual anger in Ten’s voice. </p>
<p>He decides to wait a little longer, and take the long road back home. </p>
<p>He’s almost there when he gets a text. </p>
<p>HDRY<br/>wtf happened?</p>
<p>Kun-ge<br/>I don’t know<br/>If you find out let me know</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kun knows it’s unfair to unload his frustration on Kunhang, and he’s about to write to apologize when the next message comes in. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>HDRY<br/>well congrats on making him cry </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Cry?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>HDRY<br/>What?<br/>I didn’t!<br/>I tried to talk.<br/>He got mad and stormed out.</p>
<p>HDRY<br/>listen <br/>idk what to tell u<br/>smtg’s not working<br/>ur the leader<br/>figure it out</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kun is barely able to sleep that night. </p>
<p>*</p>
<p>It’s two weeks later, two more weeks of Ten avoiding him, that things come to a halt. All of the boys are exhausted. They’ve geared up for promotions and the awards season, rehearsed their latest comeback for more hours than usual. That day, they’re in full dress and make up, ready to pre-record a performance.  They’re pre-recording for the umpteenth time when Ten almost slips on stage. He laughs it off, and everyone thinks he’s fine. They continue pre-recording, going backstage every once in a while for last minute makeup fixes. </p>
<p>Maybe it’s because a part of Kun was always so fine-tuned to him, maybe it’s because his world has narrowed down to Ten even more since he’s being ignored. But Kun notices the way Ten doesn’t appear at ease, the way his voice wobbles slightly as he dances and sings at the same time. </p>
<p>Kun tries to intercept him before their live performance. Ten avoids him, go sit down in their dressing room by himself, in the corner, plugs his earphones in and ignores the group. </p>
<p>They’re on their way to the stage and Kun wants to reach out to Ten, but he has to talk to the technicians, and make sure that their stage is ready. He sees no other options than grab Ten on their way to the stage itself. </p>
<p>He covers his mic with one hand, grabs Ten by the arm with the other. He faintly registers the crowd screaming as he brings his mouth to Ten’s ear. “If it hurts too much, wait for me I’ll help you walk back afterwards.”</p>
<p>Ten tries to pull his arm free. Kun doesn’t let him until he gets a nod of acknowledgment. </p>
<p>The lights dim, they get in place, and they perform. They give this performance everything they’ve got, despite having performed the same song a dozen times that day already. Ten powers through the dance and as they finish and pause for the last few seconds on camera. Kun sees Ten sway a little on his legs and Kun is by his side the moment he takes a tentative step to walk off stage. Kun is right there when he wavers and throws an arm around Ten in a friendly gesture to hide that he’s in fact keeping the younger man upright. Ten must be in a bad enough shape because he does not try to shake Kun off. Instead he plasters a smile on his face and waves at the staff on their way to their dressing room. </p>
<p>Kun sits Ten down, telling him in so many words to stay there. The members go through the motion of gathering their possessions, taking their coats, thanking the stylists and makeup artists. Kun tugs him back up and they walk together towards the cars. He feels Ten’s breath hiccup whenever he applies too much pressure on his leg. It makes him want to gather the younger man in his arm, carry him himself to the waiting vans. </p>
<p>It’s rained outside, and the pavement is wet. Kun feels Ten squeeze him just a little bit harder, as if afraid to fall again. The others give them strange stares. Kun wants to laugh. After weeks of being ignored, it must be strange to see them inseparable. Kun doesn’t want to decide for Ten whether to tell the others that he might be injured. When Ten keeps mum, he understands it’s not his place to give the other members an explanation.</p>
<p>Kun waves them all to get into the first van, telling them that ten and himself will take the second one. Kunhang sends him a loaded glare, a warning, but they all get in and soon enough drive off. The moment the van turns the corners, Kun feels Ten sag into his side. Kun doesn’t think before he gets his second arm around Ten and pulls him in. </p>
<p>Ten lets his head roll on Kun’s shoulder, exhaling loudly, and then inhaling again. </p>
<p>“How bad is it?” asks Kun in a breath. </p>
<p>Ten exhales and inhales again. “I’ll have to ice my ankle. Rest it for a while.”</p>
<p>“Now. How bad is it now?”</p>
<p>Kun feels Ten laugh against his shoulder. “Hurts a little,” he answers. </p>
<p>“Seems more than a little…”</p>
<p>“Since when do you care?” breathes the younger man. He still has his head ducked into Kun’s shoulder. </p>
<p>“Since when we were trainees.” Kun hopes it shuts him up. </p>
<p>They wait for the second van in silence after that. </p>
<p>Kun resents the way Ten has to pull back from him to get into the van. He does follow him in and sits next to the other man on the back seat. He immediately gathers Ten back to him and he must be especially tired or in pain, because Ten lets him. </p>
<p>Back in the dorm, Kun leads Ten to his own room and sits him down on his bed. He goes out almost immediately. He intercepts Yangyang, tells him to room with Kunhang for the night. He continues on his way to the kitchen to get ice and get back to his room. </p>
<p>When he reenters, Ten is sitting, back leaning against the wall, head tipped back. His honey hair is fanning across his forehead. Kun almost falters, holding a bag of ice carefully wrapped in a towel. He nears Ten, sits on the bed next to him. Ten turns his head in his direction, blinks his eyes open. Kun raises a hand, the one not holding the ice, and pushes Ten lightly on the shoulder. Ten resists him at first, but lets Kun lower him down on his bed. Kun situates himself again at the feet of the bed and props Ten’s ankle on his lap. He rolls the leg of the pants, holds Ten’s thin ankle between his fingers, prods it gently until he feels Ten tense under him. </p>
<p>“Sorry,” he whispers,. He grabs the bag of ice, applies it to the side of the ankle that has started swelling. “Does it hurt a lot?” </p>
<p>Ten doesn’t answer. When Kun looks up, he sees the other man staring right back at him. </p>
<p>“What are you doing?” asks Ten after a long moment of silence. </p>
<p>“Icing your ankle,” responds Kun. He lifts the bag, brushes his thumb against the skin there, puts the bag down again. </p>
<p>“Why are you doing this, then?” insists Ten. </p>
<p>“Because you’re injured. You’re one of my members, I’m your leader, you’re injured.” Kun is exasperated that he has to say that out loud. </p>
<p>Ten huffs. He tries to sit up, but Kun pushes him back down. “Stay there.”</p>
<p>“I don’t need your pity-”</p>
<p>“It’s not pity, Ten! I care! I care about you,” exclaims Kun. Ten looks stunned. “Is it so hard to believe?” he continues. “I can’t believe that… that I have to… to say it. Out loud.” </p>
<p>Kun frowns, thoroughly annoyed. He fiddles with the bag of ice, puts it back gently on Ten’s ankle. They remain in silence for a while. Kun has started to calm down when he speaks up again. </p>
<p>“Do you think you’ll be able to clean up by yourself?” </p>
<p>Ten sighs. “Yeah.” </p>
<p>“OK.” He clears up his throat. “Yangyang will be staying with Kunhang tonight, so you can take his bed.”</p>
<p>He helps Ten get up. “I’ll get more ice while you shower.” Ten nods and takes a careful step ahead. When they see he’s able to walk by himself, he leaves the room. Kun barely thinks of himself in the moment. He replaces the melted ice, and comes back to the room. He is faintly aware that he also needs to shower and get ready to sleep, so he starts undressing, leaving only his pants on. He pulls out his pajama pants, since he sleeps shirtless, and sits back on his bed to wait for Ten to come back. </p>
<p>When the younger man re-enters, he is standing a bit more uncertain on his legs, walking more painfully. Kun goes to him, loops an arm around his waist and brings him to Yangyang’s bed. He helps Ten lie down again, and this time props a pillow under his ankle. He takes a few seconds to examine it. It’s looking more swollen than it was, and is getting an angry shade of purple. They won’t have a choice but tell their manager the following day. </p>
<p>Kun reapplies ice. Ten is not looking at him, having thrown an arm over his eyes. His hair is wet and his large t-shirt is making him look small.</p>
<p>Kun tears his eyes away from him and goes to shower. </p>
<p>He comes back and Ten is in the exact same position he’d left him, except for the arm on his eyes that is now resting on his stomach. He vaguely registers that he shouldn’t think Ten is beautiful like this. </p>
<p>“I think we can remove the ice for now,” he says, pretending to not be affected by Ten. He goes to the man, give the ankle one last look, and put the ice down on a dresser. He keeps the pillow there.</p>
<p>“Do I annoy you?” suddenly asks Ten. </p>
<p>Kun, on his way to turn off the lights, whirls around. “What?”</p>
<p>“Do I annoy you? Like, for real.”</p>
<p>He is a little bit taken aback. “I mean, you can be annoying,” he answers, not really knowing where the question comes from, and whether he was giving the right answer. “But you don’t annoy me. Not like, intrinsically.”</p>
<p>“Intrinsically,” repeats Ten. </p>
<p>“Yeah.” He turns the light off, but instead of going back to his bed, he goes to Ten’s. He forces Ten to shift aside a little bit and settles down next to the other man. It is a small bed, and they barely fit together with Ten laying on his back and Kun on his side, but they make it work. </p>
<p>“Why do you ask?” inquires Kun. </p>
<p>Ten turns his head to him, humming softly. “I don’t know. I guess I’m not sure I know the difference.”</p>
<p>“The difference?”</p>
<p>“Between being annoying and annoying you intrinsically,” Ten explains. </p>
<p>Kun has to give it to him. He is not exactly being clear. “It means you don’t annoy me, except when you make fun of me a little too much, and that annoys me,” explains Kun. </p>
<p>“I don’t make fun of you-,” starts to protest Ten. </p>
<p>“You do. You know all my buttons. You push them all the time.”</p>
<p>“I tease you,” corrects Ten. </p>
<p>“No, you tease the others. You mock me,” insists Kun. </p>
<p>“I don’t… No! I don’t mock you…”</p>
<p>“You do. I’m trying to be a leader, and you make fun of me right when I do my best-”</p>
<p>“Somebody has to…” huffs Ten. </p>
<p>“Well, maybe sometimes I’m tired and I’d appreciate help, not mockery.” Kun knows he sounds stern, scolding, and he knows he’s about to get an earful. </p>
<p>“I try to… I don’t know, Kun… I try to build a… a relationship here? I try to create a fun rapport…”</p>
<p>“A fun rapport?”</p>
<p>“Relationship, understanding, whatever you wanna call it.” Ten is staring straight at him, and Kun has to contain himself as best he can to not reach out to rush his hair out of his eyes. “We don’t…” Ten seems to stop himself. “Nevermind.” He turns his face back towards the ceiling. </p>
<p>“You don’t have to build anything Ten,” says Kun after a moment. “We’re already friends-”</p>
<p>“Except we aren’t.”</p>
<p>Kun feels like he’s been slapped across the face. “What?”</p>
<p>“We aren’t friends, Kun. We’re bandmates, sure. You’re my leader, yes. But we don’t… we don’t do friends things.”</p>
<p>“I don’t understand. Friends things?”</p>
<p>“You went out to have dinner with Renjun and Chenle.”</p>
<p>When Ten doesn’t add anything, Kun asks. “And?”</p>
<p>“And we don’t do that.” </p>
<p>“Ten-”</p>
<p>“What else do you do with your friends?”</p>
<p>The question takes him aback but he thinks for a little while and answers. “Huh. Go out to eat. Shopping. Maybe going for boba.” </p>
<p>Ten puts two hands up, as if proving a point. “We don’t do any of that.”</p>
<p>“What do you do with your friends?” Kun asks. </p>
<p>A sad smile etches itself on Ten’s face. He turns to Kun again, looking at him straight in the eyes. “I don’t really have friends, you know. Apart from the members.”</p>
<p>Kun is taken aback for a second, but soon protests. “That’s not true. You have your friends from NCT -”</p>
<p>“They’re either working on new projects or on tour, I never see them.”</p>
<p>“OK, what about your Thai friends?”</p>
<p>“I never have time to hang out, our schedules are all over the place,” replies Ten. </p>
<p>Kun remains silent. </p>
<p>“So maybe that’s why I was upset when you told me to stay out of your way,” Ten continues. Ten lets out a sad laugh before shaking his head. “You don’t need anyone. You have it together. You have friends.” </p>
<p>“You do too-” objects Kun but Ten interrupts him. </p>
<p>“I have dance.” </p>
<p>Kun thinks for a moment, thinks about what Ten just told him. He cannot help but feel his heart break at the notion that Ten thinks he doesn’t have friends, and that he’s trying to be one to Kun. It is also true that their dynamic is different. Somehow, he couldn’t shake the feeling that their rapport, as Ten called it, was fundamentally different than with the others. Kun can easily imagine himself going out for dinner alone with anyone in the group. Hell, he’d done it a dozen times at least, more often than not with the maknae or Yukhei. </p>
<p>He tries hard, but cannot really imagine doing the same with Ten. He doesn’t know why, though. Just that it would be different with him. If he were to bring Ten out for dinner, he would want to look at him, and hold his hand maybe, and bring him to a proper restaurant – not their local ramen place – and touch him, and...</p>
<p>Kun interrupts his own thoughts before he goes down that rabbit hole. “I’m sorry I said those things,” he settles to say. “I didn’t mean them.” After a beat, “I want to be friends:” </p>
<p>Ten sighs. “OK.” He elbows Kun gently. “Does this mean you’ll buy me food?”</p>
<p>Kun tries not to laugh too hard at that. “Don’t push it.”</p>
<p>“Wrong person to say that too. I’ll push it.”</p>
<p>“I know,” whispers Kun with a small laugh. </p>
<p>He doesn’t remember the rest of their sleepy conversations, only that he fell asleep right there next to Ten on the small bed. </p>
<p>*</p>
<p>He wakes up to the door opening and a disgusted groan. </p>
<p>“My bed? Really? You couldn’t sleep in your bed, Kun?” </p>
<p>Kun is startled enough to sit up, and glares at Yangyang. </p>
<p>“Shut up,” he whispers. He looks over at Ten who stirs a little but seems to go back to sleep. “Don’t wake him up.”</p>
<p>Yangyang raises both hands in the air as a sign of surrender. “Just getting some clothes,” he whispers. He goes to the dresser, picks up sweatpants and a t-shirt. “Maybe you should too,” says Yangyang, pointing to Kun’s naked torso before he stalks out. </p>
<p>Kun turns back to where he is half lying in bed next to Ten. He sees that Ten turned on his side over night and that their legs are tangled under the sheets. He tries not to question how that makes him feel as he gets up, puts a t-shirt on, and goes to the kitchen. </p>
<p>Yangyang is there, apparently telling Kunhang and Sicheng all about what he just witnessed. </p>
<p>“… sleeping together! On my bed!”</p>
<p>Kun walks in and both Kunhang and Sicheng turn a questioning eye to him. </p>
<p>“Slept well?” asks Kunhang, raising an eyebrow in his direction. </p>
<p>“Ten twisted his ankle yesterday,” he announces in lieu of a reply. That seems to do the trick, as all men turn to him, suddenly somber.</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“Really? When?”</p>
<p>“During one of the pre-recording sessions. He continued to perform on it. Including during the live show.” He goes to the sink, pours himself a glass of water. “When we came back, I had him sleep in my room, so I could monitor his ankle and put some ice on it.”</p>
<p>“Doesn’t explain why you were sleeping in my bed together…” mumbles Yangyang.</p>
<p>“How is it this morning?” interrupts Sicheng, promptly ignoring the youngest.  </p>
<p>“I don’t know, I didn’t check. He’s still sleeping.” He takes a drink before he adds, “It didn’t look so bad yesterday. He’ll need to rest for a few days, at worst.”</p>
<p>They all nod. </p>
<p>“I better go call the manager now…”</p>
<p>Later that day Ten is brought to a clinic, and the doctor prescribes a few days rest. He is bedridden while the others go through their schedules. Thankfully, they do not have any places to attend in the coming days, only practice. </p>
<p>He thinks about Ten most of the time. He misses him, and catches himself staring at the empty spot he normally occupies. It’s made worse by the fact that the boys are absolutely out of control, and for some reason, badgering him even more than usual. </p>
<p>Kun cannot help but notice that there would normally be Ten here, to entertain them, tease them back, act as his own personal wall of sanity. Maybe that’s how Ten tries to help him, by being present, by looking after the others while he is busy. And Kun. Kun would push him back whenever he’d turn to him for a laugh. </p>
<p>Ten relocated to his room, and Kun drops by twice daily, to say hi and check up on him. On the third day, he walks in Kunhang and Ten’s room to see Ten on his tablet, drawing, and Kunhang playing on his phone. </p>
<p>He sits down by Ten, tries to peek at the tablet. </p>
<p>“Don’t look, it’s not finished!”</p>
<p>“Does it matter? I wanna see it!” </p>
<p>Ten bats his hands away but Kun insists. Ten relents. “Just doodling.”</p>
<p>It’s a small bouquet of flowers, drawn in the style Ten likes.</p>
<p>“It’s really pretty,” he whispers. He means it. </p>
<p>“Thanks.” </p>
<p>Kunhang gets up from his bed, mumbles something about having somewhere to go, and leaves. </p>
<p>Kun leans on the headboard, next to Ten. “So, how’s the ankle today?”</p>
<p>Ten puts the tablet down, lifts his outstretched leg to show Kun. “The swelling is almost entirely gone. Still bruised a little though.” </p>
<p>“I hope you can come back soon,” tells him Kun. </p>
<p>Ten hums, turning a playful smile to the leader. “Do you miss me already?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, actually I do.” </p>
<p>Ten’s smile freezes. “Yeah?”</p>
<p>Kun huffs. “Are you surprised? Of course I do,” he reiterates. “Plus, the kids are driving me insane.”</p>
<p>“I can imagine,” laughs Ten. Kun thinks maybe it’s his imagination, but he thinks Ten looks blushed. “You’ve had to manage them yourself. Just a few more days and I’ll be back.” </p>
<p>So Kun did not imagine it, he thinks. Ten does look after the others. He does try to help Kun. </p>
<p>They chat a little bit. Ten shows him more drawings he’s done. Kun updates him on the new routine they’re learning. Soon enough, Kun’s eyes start to droop and Ten pushes him on the bed to lie down. </p>
<p>“You’re tired, Kunnie. I think you should sleep.”</p>
<p>Kun grumbles that he should get up to go back to his own room, but Ten lies down next to him, and curls on his side. </p>
<p>“Just sleep already, it’s been a long day.” </p>
<p>Kun hums and quickly falls asleep. He wakes in the morning to a silent room. Ten is sleeping soundly next to him, having thrown a hand across Kun’s waist. Kun peeks over at Kunhang’s bed to see it empty. The boy must have gone to Kun’s room when found them both asleep in his. </p>
<p>Kun lies back down, and turn his attention to Ten. His face is puffy with sleep, and his hair is dry from the constant bleaching. He looks beautiful, Kun thinks to himself. He is unable to fall asleep again, but stays there until Ten stirs awake. </p>
<p>Kun is thankful that none of the members decide to highlight the fact that he hasn’t slept in his own bed for the second time in a week. Apart from Kunhang’s occasional side glance, no one comments on it.</p>
<p>Ten is given the green light to walk again that day, and there is no denying the joy he has to finally be free from his bed. He cannot dance yet, but he is able to resume his other activities. The next few days see them tip-toeing around each other, sending each other smiles from across the kitchen or living room when it’s Ten who visits him again one evening. </p>
<p>“Hey.”</p>
<p>Yangyang isn’t there, watching a film with Yukhei in the living room. Ten wobbles over to his bed, throwing himself on it next to Kun. </p>
<p>“You stopped coming over, so I thought I’d pay you a visit,” explains Ten, stretching his arms above his head. Kun drops down on the bed to be eye-level with him. </p>
<p>“Ah. Sorry, I didn’t think you’d want-”</p>
<p>“Don’t apologize. I wasn’t chiding you. That’s your role.”</p>
<p>“Hey! I don’t-” Kun’s protest dies in his throat when Ten rolls over and settles his head on Kun’s shoulder. </p>
<p>“What were you gonna say?” </p>
<p>Kun sighs. “Nothing.” They stay in silence for a little while, until Kun cannot help himself anymore. He wraps an arm around Ten’s waist. When Ten lets him, he feels confident enough to ask. “How is it going now?”</p>
<p>“Hmm?”</p>
<p>“Your ankle. How is it?”</p>
<p>Ten looks up to Kun where he is effectively cuddling him. “Should be able to start practice again in a few days.”</p>
<p>“Good.” </p>
<p>Kun feels Ten relax a little more into him, sink a little deeper. “So, when are you taking me out for dinner?”</p>
<p>God, if only he knew how he makes Kun feel. Kun clears his throat, tries to laugh. “When are you free?”</p>
<p>Ten settles his own arm across Kun’s chest. “For you? Anytime.” </p>
<p>Kun doesn’t know whether he should say it, everything that’s been swarming in his head since their argument of a few weeks back. “Ten, listen…” Ten shifts in his arms, turning his attention to him. “I, huh… I wanted to apologize. I wanted to apologize that I made you feel like you were annoying. You’re not.”</p>
<p>“Hmm. I thought we had settled that though?”</p>
<p>Kun laughs. “Yes, but I realize now that it’s my fault. I’ve been pushing you away. I know now that’s it’s because you were making me feel insecure about myself.”</p>
<p>Ten very carefully raises his head form Kun’s shoulder. </p>
<p>“I’ve been making you feel insecure?” He sounds flabbergasted. </p>
<p>Kun smiles at him, bring a hand to his fringe, pushes it out of his eyes. “Yeah,” he breathes out. </p>
<p>“Me? I’ve been making you feel insecure?”</p>
<p>Kun’s smile grows bigger. </p>
<p>“Yeah. It can’t be that surprising, though.”</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“I mean, you’re you.”</p>
<p>Ten looks at him, absolutely speechless. “What are you talking about?”</p>
<p>“I think I was envious?” continues Kun. He hears Ten whisper another stunned “What?” but decides to carry on with his explanation. “I think I just wish I was more like you, you know.”</p>
<p>“Like me how? You’re not making any sense.”</p>
<p>“You’re so beautiful. You know that, right? You walk into a room and it’s like there’s no one else.” He sees Ten raise is head from Kun’s shoulder and pop his mouth opened. “And you’re so talented. It’s unbelievable. I don’t know how to explain it, but there a color to your voice? And something you’re able to express when you dance…”</p>
<p>“Kun, Kun, look at me please.” Ten turns Kun’s head in his direction, settles his hand on his cheek. “How can you say that? You shouldn’t envy me. Not you. You’re so strong, and steady, and… and there!” protests Ten. “You always know what to do. When anyone needs advice, they go to you! I’m not...I’m not like that...”</p>
<p>“You’re so fucking beautiful. You’re just so… captivating. You’re the better artist…”</p>
<p>“That’s not true!” exclaims Ten. “You make your own music! You write entire songs, Kun! You… you…” Ten is gripping him hard, as if he needs Kun there, under him, to keep him together. “I just… Kun, you…” And as if words fail him, Ten clasps both hands on Kun’s face and kisses him hard. </p>
<p>Kun’s body is reacting for him, hugging Ten close to him as the younger licks at his lip. He opens up to give him access, and sighs in Ten’s mouth when he’s finally able to taste him. Ten kisses him a few times before he withdraws. “Is this OK?” he pants against Kun’s lips and the leader doesn’t know a better way to respond than by capturing Ten’s lips with his. Kun let his arms wanders across Ten’s back, let the younger man waive a hand in his hair. </p>
<p>He doesn’t know how long they kiss for, just that his thoughts have quieted down now that he has what he craved for so long. </p>
<p>The door bangs open and someone screams. </p>
<p>“My eyes! My eyes!” </p>
<p>Ten detaches himself from Kun to look back at a screaming Yangyang who has put both hands on his eyes. “I recommend you sleep in my room tonight,” he says simply, before lowering himself back down on Kun’s chest. </p>
<p>Kun is left with no words. He looks as Yangyang grabs his pajamas hurriedly and almost runs out of the room. He brings his attention back to Ten. </p>
<p>“So, where were we?” says the dancer, placing a careful hand on Kun’s cheek. He kisses him again softly, pecks him on his lips a few times, and is about to kiss him deeper when Kun stops him. “What?” demands the younger man. </p>
<p>Kun looks at him, at his red lips, beautifully swollen, at his flustered looks. “That dinner, can it be a date?” </p>
<p>An adoring smile blooms on Ten’s face. “Yeah,” he says, kissing him once. “It better be one.”</p>
<p>“Okay,” nods Kun, letting the man on top of him resume the kiss. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Later that night he sees a text from Kunhang. </p>
<p>HDRY<br/>i should let u know<br/>u traumatized yangx2<br/>but i’m happy u fixed ur problem<br/>finally</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hope you enjoyed! let me know what you thought, and check out my other kunten fics! <br/>also, would anyone be interested in a/b/o Kunten? i might have an idea, just wondering what is the will of the people~~</p></blockquote></div></div>
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